


listen before i go

by AbsinthexMind



Series: Oh brother where art thou [46]
Category: Twilight (Movies), Twilight Series - Stephenie Meyer
Genre: Begging, Blood Drinking, Brother/Sister Incest, Doubt, F/M, Family Reunions, Fear, Freedom, Incest, Life Partners, Reunions, Secret Relationship, Separations, Sibling Incest, Vampire Family, Vampires, killer vampire, life style differences
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-19
Updated: 2019-09-19
Packaged: 2020-10-12 16:06:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,142
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20567117
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AbsinthexMind/pseuds/AbsinthexMind
Summary: For once in your life you wished your brother was able to hear your thoughts. You wished he would truly listen.





	listen before i go

“There’s my wayward sister.” 

Standing up from the dirty floor of the alley, you use your jacket sleeve to wipe off the fresh blood that coated your face. “If it isn’t my vegetarian brother. Care to break your diet? I’m willing to share.” 

From the moment the both of you were turned you became like night and day. There was a freedom you had never had before and you weren’t willing to give it up quite as easily. 

“(y/n). . .” Edward’s voice is deep and full of concern. 

It makes you roll your eyes. “Oh don’t sound so holier than thou, Ed. You came looking for me knowing how I am. I’m not gonna let you shame me. This is the life I want.” Piercing red eyes glare at your brother from within the dark. “I thought you gave up on me anyway. What changed your mind?” 

You kneel back down to your kill, awaiting Edward’s answer. 

A break in his voice as he chokes on his words. “I missed you.” 

Hands pause from pulling out the glass bottles and other equipment from inside of your backpack. A dull ache in your chest makes you bite your lip. “Oh yeah? After ten years of hearing nothing from you, you suddenly decide you miss me now?” Concentrating on your task at hand you notice your hand shaking subtly. 

“Every day I don’t see you I miss you more and more. You’re the missing piece.” He admits then pauses. “What are you doing?” 

“Meal prep.” 

His breath hitches. “(y/n)-” 

“Stop whatever you’re going to say. I need to eat too and this is the only way that’s economical. Would you rather me kill whenever I’m hungry?” A patient sigh escapes from you. “Anyway, you were saying about how you missed me and whatnot.” 

The sound of his shoes hitting against the dirt told you that he was drawing closer to you. “I met someone. A girl. I can’t read her mind. She wants a relationship with me but I know. . . I know I can never be with anyone the way I was with you.” 

“That was centuries ago.” You whisper not really to your brother, more so to yourself. Trying to convince yourself that those days were long gone. You could never had what you did when you were human. It should have been easier now that you were immortal beings with no one to scorn or judge you. The fact of the matter was that the two of you were just too different. You had tried to carry on your incestuous relationship after being turned but you wanted different things in life. You wanted to explore and see the world, live life like any other vampire while Edward and Carlisle wanted to stay low and hidden from the world. Edward tried many times to reign you in but he saw how miserable living a sedentary life was making you. You’d already lived that life as a human and you nearly died. 

What could you do but run away? 

It pained you to leave Edward but he made it clear what he wanted his new life to be. “We tried, remember? I can’t live like that Edward. I don’t want to.” 

“Please (y/n), we can try again. I love you. I miss you.” His begging broke your heart more than anything. 

Sadly you laugh. “I wish for once you could read my mind and see how I think. I wish you could’ve all those years ago. I love you too Edward. I’ve never stopped loving you but I don’t want to be caged up like a bird. I’m more than that.” 

“I promise not to hold you down as much.” Edward’s now right behind you as you continue to numbly do your work. All of the blood is almost done draining into your bottles. “I just want to see you more than once every decade.” 

“You want me to go to the Cullen house.” You put away some of the bottles that were already filled into your bag. “But I highly doubt they’ll let me drink human blood there.” 

“I’ll talk to them. Just. . . please. Give it one more shot.” His knees collapse onto the ground behind you, strong arms wrapping around you and pulling you into him. It had been so long since you had felt his embrace, you felt like crying. Your hands stop altogether, still coated with red blood. “Give us one more shot.” 

Your eyes stung as your body really wanted to sob but you were unable to. Tears weren’t for vampires. You couldn’t ask out loud what if it didn’t work out? What then? Would you just never see your brother again? Your one true mate. That thought was unbearable to think, even more unbearable to admit out loud. 

Dry heaving sobs were all you were able to do as you clung to him, nails digging and tearing into the fabric of his long-sleeve shirt. You didn’t want to get hurt again, but you wanted to try; at least once more. 

You didn’t want to let him go.  
  
  
*  
  
  


They all stared at you, well, more specifically your blood red eyes; a sign that you were indulging in human blood. Not like they’re honey clear ones that they got from drinking animal blood. For once you felt self conscious of yourself as you walked into the Cullen’s incredibly nice house. A beautifully restored house courtesy of Esme. You felt too dirty to even set foot inside with your ripped jeans and dirty jacket that still had stains from where you wiped your bloody face. They could all smell it on you, making Jasper and Rosalie recoil from the semi-fresh stench. You hadn’t had time to change. Edward was scared that if you were given time to yourself that you would run away again. He took you straight from where he found you all the way to Forks. You left your backpack filled with blood in his car. 

“Hello (y/n). It’s been a while.” Carlisle is the first to greet you but you could see the intense hesitation on his face. 

You take a deep breath. “Yes it has.” 

Rosalie, with her arms crossed, looks right at you with pure disgust. “Geez, where did Edward find you? Right off the street?” 

“Rosalie.” Esme hisses at her. 

“What? She’s filthy.” Was her only defense against her comment. 

“That’s my fault.” Edward immediately steps in. “I insisted she come with me right away. I didn’t really give her much time to clean herself up. I figured she could do it here.” 

Alice rolls her eyes and walks up to you, her hand on your arm. “You should know better than that Ed. A lady requires time to wash up. Come with me (y/n). I’ll give you some of my clothes to wear.”

Without much protest you followed her away from the front door and to the winding staircase that led to the second level of the house. A small smile manages to grace your lips as you took each step up. How far your brother has come from those days in your Chicago home. Your home wasn’t exactly as magnificent as the one he lived in now, but it was modest. Always modest, reflecting the care that your biological mother took in rearing you and your brother. She was a modest woman, a kind woman that dedicated her life to her children. 

Event the bathroom that Alice showed you was much more extravagant than your childhood one. 

“You can wash up here. Take your time. There are clean towels in the shelves on the side of the bathtub. I’ll put some clothes out for you on the counter.” She offers you a warm smile, gold eyes trying to convey that you were welcome in their home despite your diet. “It’s really good to see you again, (y/n).” 

“It’s really good to see you too.” Honestly it was. Despite your differences you loved your adoptive siblings. Well, maybe not all of them, but most of them you cared deeply for. “Thank you.” 

With a nod she leaves you to your own devices. Tired, you sigh and start shedding your old clothes. Clothes that were caked and stained with blood. You really wished Edward had given you at least some time to clean yourself up. This was no way to come home. You knew Jasper was still struggling with controlling himself around human blood. You could see it on his face when you walked in. The immediate strain in his face when he caught the scent on you. 

But Edward was terrified of you leaving again without any notice. That was your fault for having done that to him so many times in the past. If you hadn’t you knew he would have never let you go. 

After filling the tub with a reasonable amount of steaming hot water, you submerge yourself in it and lay your back against the porcelain tub. There was plenty of room in the tub so you could relax and stretch your legs out without having them be cramped. 

Hair wet and slicked back you stare at the water, remembering when your mother would bathe you and Edward together as small children. Her caring hands smoothing over your hair, smiling down at you as Edward splashed happily in the bath water. There were hardly any memories where you weren’t smiling around your mom. She always made sure you and your brother were utterly happy without your father. Even now you couldn’t remember your father. He was hardly there to begin with. When he died of the Spanish influenza you didn’t weep. Merely accepted that there was one less person in your family. 

You didn’t really remember being sick yourself. It was so long ago that you had forgotten what it felt like to have a simple cold. You had been in and out of consciousness the memories from that time were all foggy. What you did remember was waking up from a deep sleep to a bright new world full of endless possibilities. 

And being incredibly hungry. 

They could never accept your lifestyle, no matter how hard you tried to make the process as humane as possible. You tried not to kill people too often, that’s why you drained the blood and saved it for later. A savage way of living nonetheless. 

Using a wet washcloth you begin to run it along your arms, wiping off the grime from the day. First from your wrists then up your forearm until you reached your shoulder and crossed it over your collarbone. There was a slight hitch in your throat as you closed your eyes. Like it was yesterday you recall the feel of Edward kissing you there. Lovingly at the bone slightly sticking out. Littering your body with love bites; trying to control himself so not to leave them in places where your mother would see. 

Many vampires over a certain amount of years start to forget their human life. You didn’t want to though. You wanted to hold onto everything. Even though you loved your life now, you wanted to remember the sweet moments when you were innocent and human. That was when you and Edward were able to love each other without anything getting in the way. Well, besides the fact that you were siblings. 

In your childhood home you were able to love freely. Running through the halls as Edward chased you, swooping his strong arms around you that made you giggle with such joy. How the two of you would lay out in the backyard in the summer, enjoying the breeze and the brightness of the sun. His fingers tracing patterns along your bare arm as the two of you stared up at the vast blue sky that was endless. Sweet taste of the water from the lake where you would ride your bikes and swim in. 

So much more simpler.  


Thoroughly washing yourself until you deemed yourself presentable, you wrap a towel around your wet body and glance at the counter where Alice had left you some clothes. A soft white dress with a crinkly bodice and small red flowers all over it. Black leggings were also present right next to the dress. If they belonged to Alice you wondered if they would even fit you. She was incredibly petite and you would definitely tear anything that belonged to her. 

Luckily it fit you like a glove making you think that perhaps she used her future vision to predict that you would be visiting and prepared for you. 

“What did they say?” You ask your brother once you open his door. 

He had the strap of your backpack in one of his pale hands, just about to set it down onto his computer chair. Your other luggage was neatly set down in front of his bed. Walls covered with a sea of endless books engulfed his large room. Books that were dated to be centuries old; some of them belonged to you. Left behind when you went off on your own. There were a handful of your old belongings that you hadn’t been able to take with you. Your mother’s silver jewelry box was tucked away in the bookcase along with other knick knacks from when you were human. 

Edward replies to you with a sigh. “They really don’t like the fact that you still consume human blood. Moreso now considering that Jasper is still trying to adjust.” 

“If he uses my method he shouldn’t have to worry about killing so many people.” 

“He doesn’t want to. He wants to be a vegetarian like the rest of us.” He shakes his head, running a hand through his coppery tresses. “They’ll let you stay here as long as you go out of the state for your. . . meals. And obviously don’t show up covered in it.” 

“Naturally.” You spot something next to his bed that made you grin from ear to ear. “Oh my god. You still have that god awful picture?” 

Immediately your feet take you to the side of his bed where his nightstand was and pick up the small oval picture frame. The dark wood still resilient after so many years. 

Grinning, Edward goes to stand next to you. “Of course. It’s my favorite picture of all time.” 

Even though the picture frame was still in magnificent condition, the photo behind the glass had seen better days. It was incredibly faded, making the black and white print even harder to see. You could still make out the two small children that were in it though. A small boy standing up beside a little girl sitting down on a tiny stool. Both looked seriously up at the camera. The little girl had her hair done in tight curls that framed her chubby face. A ribbon tied to the side of her hair. Little Edward looked ever dapper in his Sunday suit, hair slicked back; even the old camera was able to pick up the light color of his eyes. 

“I remember how mom was getting so frustrated with you because you wouldn’t sit still.” He chuckles. 

“What about you? You kept complaining that your shoes were pinching your feet.” Retorting back you keep your eyes on the photo. “How old were we in this picture?” 

His hand gingerly takes the picture from you so he could best discern your ages. “I want to say that I was seven, maybe eight. That would’ve made you around five. Mom absolutely loved dressing you up and buying you the frilliest dresses ever made.” 

“She loved us to death.” You whisper. It was before she died that she had begged Carlisle to save you and your brother. 

“Yeah she did.” There was always melancholy when you or your brother spoke of your mother. 

Silence fell over the two of you, lost in your own thoughts.Your mom risked her own life in order to nurse you and your brother back to health. In the end she got sick as well. 

“You won’t leave me again in the dead of night. . . right?” Edward finally speaks up, tentative and cautious as to not startle you, like you were scared and feral animal. Like he didn’t want to scare you away. “I can’t read your mind so I don’t know what you’re thinking of doing. . . it’s incredibly frustrating.” 

You nod. “It is. I wish you could just hear what I’m thinking. . . At first I thought it was cool that you couldn’t. But it just seems more of an inconvenience now. Even if I do tell you, it’s difficult for you to understand. To understand what I feel.” Where the picture had once been was a small meticulously carved wooden box. There was a design of a hummingbird on the top and little flowers dancing on the bottom portion. You glide your fingers over the smooth mahogany wood. 

“I used to know everything about you. How you felt, your hopes and dreams. . .” There was immense sadness as he spoke. “Sometimes I think we were better off being human. Turning just changed us so drastically.” 

“Life was simpler when we were human.” Agreeing with your brother you pick up the box and lift open the lid. Staring back at you is your mother’s beloved ring. The ring your father had given to her when he proposed. It was supposed to be a promise of his eternal love for her; what had happened to that promise? He had hardly been home making her so lonely. Now the ring only represented hollow promises and twisting lies. “We were simpler. Humans are such simple creatures, Ed. They don’t require much in their life. Vampires though. . . Much more complicated. We are creatures that live for centuries off of living blood. We’ve witnessed world wars without batting an eye. They fly by us.” 

That seemed to make his mood even darker as he took the box from you, withdrawing the ring from inside of it. Honey eyes stare down at it. “Do you think we can ever be the way we used to?” 

“I don’t know.” Admitting it scared you. No matter how much you loved him, you didn’t think you could go back to being the way you used to. “But I’ve never been one to give up so easily. It’s worth giving this another try. Just try and be a little more understanding. . . That’s all I ask. Listen to me before I go.” 

That brings a smile to your brother’s face as he slowly kneels down in front of you, taking your left hand in his. Edward’s gaze never left your face as he slipped the ring onto your finger. The finger that was supposed to be for you wedding ring. “I promise.”


End file.
